Dance Class Challenge: 90/100 - Pilates Essentials

I found one last Pilates video on Netflix instant that I'd never tried before. This one was good but seemed to be more pre-Pilates stretches than full-on Pilates. I got a good stretch and was ready to sleep after.

I have a history of my dogs wanting to participate in Pilates mat work at home. You can see Doodlebug and Buster anchoring the top of my mat. I guess they're part of the reason I'm getting my Pilates mat certification next year. I know they'll be enthusiastic as I study in my living room.

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Dance Class Challenge: 89/100 - Dance Off the Inches: Calorie Blasting Party

I was all set to head out for yoga and ballet yesterday afternoon, even though Evie was unable to join me, until something happened: it rained.  For those who don't live in LA, this may not seem like a big deal.  We don't get a lot of rain here.  We have frequent flooded streets due to poor drainage when it rains.  We have to replace our wiper blades twice a year because our low humidity and constant sunshine cook the rubber on our blades between seasons.  We have shit (smoggy shit) and dirty roads, making street conditions even less pleasant.  Since this is a driving town, most folks want to just get the hell home when it rains so we don't get stuck someplace and don't spend a couple hours making a commute that usually takes 20 minutes.  We're really damn impatient.

I found myself at home, enjoying the smell of the rain for a few moments when I took my dogs out before rushing in to warm up by the heater.  I decided to hit "Dance Off the Inches: Calorie Blasting Party" on Netflix instant.  I did break a sweat and could mark another hash in my tally.

I'm generally terrible with aerobics and fitness dance.  I think a grapevine should be called a grapevine and not a 'crosswalk.'  A step-ball-change needn't be dumbed down to a 'rock & roll.'  I'm also not a fan of the faux best buds friendship that some instructors try to use in their videos (like "we're having such a party, girlfriend!".  There were things I didn't quite get and I looked like a total dork.  I did burn calories and get my heart rate up, but this is not a favorite video.

Don't Panic!

Photo by Chris Beyond 2011

Photo by Chris Beyond 2011

Photo by Chris Beyond 2011

Here are photos from last week's Monday Night Tease! presents The Hitchhiker's Guide to Burlesque.  You can see our lovely missiles in the first photo and the pot of petunias and sperm whale in the second.  I think the third one would make a great holiday card, but I don't know that my grandmother would get it.  I don't think she's read any Douglas Adams.  Oh, and she may be a little shocked by Andrew's sperm whale.

Rumpus Revue and No Panties Required

Photo by Markus Alias

I do love dancing in theaters because the vice laws aren't there.  This is from "Flower Duet" at the last Rumpus Revue.  I had to wear a panty with sides beneath my sideless panty last time I did this number in Los Angeles because of the pesky vice laws.  It's funny that I can do the number in other cities with no problem because I have the required 1" of buttcrack covered; they don't care so much about my sexy, sexy hip bones and sides of my upper legs.

Dance Class Challenge: 88/100 - Stretch Zone

My quads were aching yesterday from Sunday's Kundalini class, but Evie kept me motivated to go to class anyway.  I'm glad I went because I was less sore.  Bill led the exact stretches my body needed, and the soundtrack was seasonal and amusing.  (One of my criteria for a good dance class is the teacher's thoughtfulness in actually selecting a soundtrack for the class and not running over to the stereo after every song to find the song they really want to hear for the next section of the lesson.  Do your preparation at home, teachers.)

Sixteen days left this month, two of which are holidays.  Twelve classes to go.  I have my eyes on two classes with Evie Thursday, a class on my own and one with the mister on Saturday, another class Sunday, and a class Tuesday.  That's 94 before my holiday commitments.  I wonder which studios are open Christmas Eve.

Dance Class Challenge: 87/100 - Kundalini Yoga

This was my second of twenty classes on my Groupon.  Evie joined me.  It really helps to have a workout buddy, but you should know that by now.

Kundalini yoga isn't so much about flexibility as it is about endurance and getting in touch with yourself.  I really need the endurance training.  With my asthma, I get winded when I dance hard.  I have an inhaler to use before I do high energy numbers so I don't have an attack.  That works fine and all, but I'd rather not have to worry about taking medicine within a week of using my inhaler for fear of death.  (It's some pretty toxic shit so I use it very rarely.)  Today's exercises helped me control my breathing and slow my heart rate after doing something intense.  I need to work on that more because I have a high energy number up my sleeve that's itching to break free.

Dance Class Challenge: 86/100 - 10 Minute Solution: Target Toning

I had all these fantastic plans to hit yoga then jazz class yesterday before my laser appointment, growler refills and crochet class.  My wardrobe, however, had other plans.  It was laundry day, and it wasn't done drying in time for me to go to class.  (One of these days I'll feel grown up enough to buy a washer and dryer instead of spending my money on rhinestones and tiny panties.  Today is not that day.)  So I buckled down with a Netflix instant video.

This works the same as the other 10 Minute Solution videos with six different sections.  The instructor was very enthusiastic and used the perfect words of encouragement; I think she's be an amazing personal trainer if she isn't already one.  I got a solid workout and didn't feel so guilty about the dent I had yet to make in my growler of hefeweisen.

Not all videos on Netflix are equal.  I did The Situation Workout since I'm willing to try anything, but I started a second video yesterday and abandoned ship after the first twenty minutes.  I absolutely hated 10 Minute Solution: Carb Burner.  That video is not for me.  I'm taking no credit for the twenty minutes I spent doing it because I hated it.  I wish I would've walked out of a couple classes I've taken this year as easily as I could shut off that video.